Some think being authentic is not telling lies, being good, doing the right things, the good things – the good-girl, good-boy syndrome. We have been programmed to think in those terms. But where does that concept of being a good girl, being a good boy really come from? It may just come from other people who want to keep you in line, who want to keep you doing what they want you to do. It has nothing to do with being authentic. It has something to do with control. It gets ingrained in us over and over again in the early years.
In my childhood, I dreamed that when I grew up, I would marry a train conductor, so I could, in my imagination, travel for free! I shared this dream with my sister and a close friend. The friend said she had a feeling, that in the future more people would be flying to travel. I should aim higher – literally, to become a pilot’s wife rather than a train conductor’s.
Without trying to hypnotize you, I’d like you to stare into the graphic art for a minute or two.
Maybe lots of circles, maybe a depth, maybe confusing, maybe fractured, maybe patterns, or even motion…
It’s a natural thing when you look into such an image and begin to see movement. The brain doesn’t know how to read all the patterns that have been specifically designed, so it starts seeing motions, and many times a motion will draw you into it. Sometimes it’ll feel like it’s coming at you.
Many people I come across understand that many of their issues—whether emotional, mental, behavioural, and perhaps even physical—can come down to a lack of self-confidence. Heather, my new client had just come to see me about her body-image and perceived difficulty in dating when I mentioned she may just lack a little confidence.
“Yes, I know that!” she exclaimed. And then she looked at me innocently, as if she was asking me, “Now what can you do Kemila to bring some confidence to me, through the magic you know that’s called hypnosis?”
Kathy told me that she just left another job–or, more accurately, was let go by another employer. As I listened to her talk of her problems, her words came out as fast as her footsteps. I asked her, trying to slow her down, “What would you like to work on through hypnotherapy?”
I breathe in the fragrance of my herbs and flowers. I planted them. Miracle grew them. And now I am grown by them. They are my teachers, as everyone and everything is my teacher.
Between two big rocks, there can be very limited soil, so limited that the eyes cannot see, but a tiny little flow can grow out of it. Life! Fragile but forever strong. Forever beautiful that’s who I am.
One day, my 13-and-half-year-old client asked me, “Why does one unwanted thought stick in my head for long? Other good thoughts don’t?”
I found that a very genuine authentic observation, actually a very wise question. I had to think for a moment. And I answered him that the unreal thoughts have to be louder and stickier, to work harder to appear it’s real. What is real doesn’t have to be loud, because it is already real – that we hear it or not doesn’t change its reality.
The year was 1907. Isabel lived in a small mountain house with her parents and three older brothers. Her father didn’t like her because she was a girl. “Girls are useless” her father would say. Her three brothers helped their father logging. The oldest brother took on the same attitude toward her as their father. Isabel only felt comfortable with her mother and two younger brothers.