Tagged: ego

Getting Old as a Child 2

Getting Old as a Child

As I approach the last month of being 55 years old, I have started to ponder many things.

When I was younger, I looked at old people. From my young heart, “oldness” was their identity. Like “young-ness” was my assumed identity. Like, they were born old. And I will be young forever. Yes, we all get old. I could say it back then too; however, I only knew it conceptually. I didn’t feel it, not like the way I could feel living in another country, away from my birth country, while I still lived in China.

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Why do We Worry?

We all live in the here-and-now and we all form ideas about what constitutes reality. Sometimes we confuse our ideas about reality with reality itself. What we think of as reality is based on our upbringing and learning from our experiences. As such, any ideas and opinions about reality can’t help but be subjective and judgmental.

Therefore, the eye reproduces; it does not see. The ear translates; it does not hear. When our ideas about reality are not in alignment with our desires, we think reality is bad and not one that we want to be in, instead of questioning our ideas about it.

Google Ranking and Provincial Election 0

Google Ranking and Provincial Election

My phone rang, and I answered. Someone on the other side of the wireless invisible line said my website was not on Google page number 1 and he could help me fix that, so I could have more customers and get myself busier.

“There’s something to fix” is a very interesting mindset.

Wasn’t Google set up to help the users?

Isn’t this setup supposed to be organic?

I have not hesitated to put myself out there when I need to, and whenever I have time, in the forms of writing and speaking. If some other people rather than I get on Google page number 1, it only means, supposedly, either Google thinks they can serve others better than I do or they have more time and energy to serve. How can I ever not be happy for that?

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The Fountainhead of My Inspiration

On the surface level of the storyline, it is a book about how an artist, an architect, chose to stay true to his art and his work, no matter how hard it could get and how many shortcuts were offered. On a deeper level, it was quite philosophical. The author, Ayn Rand, was considered a philosopher as much as a writer. Yet, there’s even more depth to it. As my soul was resonating with Howard, his calm nature, his matter-of-factness, his sovereignty… He stood for our own perfect and self-sufficient spiritual nature.

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Turn Thoughts to Thinking

“Turn thoughts to thinking.” When this idea first came to me on one of those morning walks, it lit a light bulb in my head. Everything became crystal clear, including many ways I could use it to illustrate and explain how the mind works, or not.

Lost and found in Cartagena Columbia 0

Your Soul’s Plan

Friday evening, 8:45 pm, I was still in the office, waiting for yet another client to show up. It was a long day, but my client sounded urgent when she called me at noon. She said she only needed one hour. I let her squeeze into my calendar.

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Being Authentic

Some think being authentic is not telling lies, being good, doing the right things, the good things – the good-girl, good-boy syndrome. We have been programmed to think in those terms. But where does that concept of being a good girl, being a good boy really come from? It may just come from other people who want to keep you in line, who want to keep you doing what they want you to do. It has nothing to do with being authentic. It has something to do with control. It gets ingrained in us over and over again in the early years.

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Journeys or Destinations

In my childhood, I dreamed that when I grew up, I would marry a train conductor, so I could, in my imagination, travel for free! I shared this dream with my sister and a close friend. The friend said she had a feeling, that in the future more people would be flying to travel. I should aim higher – literally, to become a pilot’s wife rather than a train conductor’s.

Awakening Human 0

Awakening Human

One day, my 13-and-half-year-old client asked me, “Why does one unwanted thought stick in my head for long? Other good thoughts don’t?”

I found that a very genuine authentic observation, actually a very wise question. I had to think for a moment. And I answered him that the unreal thoughts have to be louder and stickier, to work harder to appear it’s real. What is real doesn’t have to be loud, because it is already real – that we hear it or not doesn’t change its reality.

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Teardrop Speaks

Brenda’s Teardrop is her ego. The ego is the mind-made entity that consists of a bundle of thoughts that occur frequently. In the bundle of thoughts are all the things that we’ve identified with ourselves – job positions, relationships, accomplishments, disappointments, our successes and failures, what other people think of us, all those thoughts form in the mind. They come together and congregate in a bundle. These congregated bundles of recurring thoughts become the place where we derive our sense of self. It is a story-based entity – The Me and my story. And the story is called “My Life”. My life becomes a mental construct. The way we interpret memories.